i looked in the steamapps folder and it is empty - i have all files and folders showing from control panel.

hmmm.

what is your operating system ?

/steamapps folder should never be empty. Even with a basic Steam install and no games, there is a /sourcemods directory and a libraryfolders.vdf file that Steam puts there.

Regardless, if your /steamapps folder is empty, you're not launching a steam version of the game.